E-Gov (Viewer discretion is advised)

This is the place to recount your superheroic deeds for all to gaze upon with astonishment and wonder.
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Jim Profit
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E-Gov (Viewer discretion is advised)

Postby Jim Profit » Thu Mar 19, 2009 2:29 am

This is probably the best game I've ever been in. It has so many PCs I'll just have to introduce them as I go along. It comes as no suprise that in a world of superheroes, why would they go around saving lives when they become rich and famous? Or better yet.. Get into politics? I mean who's going to argue with a super hero, right? I'm sure they start off as vigilantes, earning the people's trust. Then try to play the game and serve office to get their way... But that doesn't always plan out... That's when the super fights break out... There's four major parties in the first half of the series so far. The democrats, the republicans, the libertarians, and the communists..
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ISSUE #1: Democracy is NOT for the people!
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MwahahahaHA! I have awakened from my slumber! The Earth shall once again be mine and--

Planned Parenthood Employee: Uh..sir... you're not allowed behind the desk..

Zuur: Foolish mortal! I am Zuur! The dark knight of the underworld! I was bound by your pathetic little priests under this very spot by...

Planned Parenthood Employee: Yeah, I kind of figured that with the dark spooky flames *hand gestures*. But... you're not allowed behind the the desk.. so if you could please...

Zuur: I was awakened from the blood of ten thousand innocent childs blood spilled upon my prison! Hummanity has sealed it's fate! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Planned Parenthood Employee: Oh great... We got ourselves a radical... SIGH! *Calls for security*

Planned Parenthood Employee: Yeah, we got ourselves one of them westbro baptist church guys I think... I don't know! He says his name is

Zuur: ZUUR! EVERYTIME MY NAME IS UTTERED A CHILL ROLLS DOWN THE SPINE OF GOD!!!

Planned Parenthood Employee: You heard him. "Zuur!" Could you get down here?! I have people waiting inline! *Stabs the PP employee in the stomache with his sword*

Another PP Employee: Hey! You just stabbed her! You're in big trouble mister!

Zuur: MY SWORD THRISTS FOR BLOOD! YOU SHALL BE NEXT WENCH!

Another PP Employee: I hate these uppity Christians... *Gets stabbed*


Lou Dobbs: Today there was a masscare at the planned parenthood down at Region Bulevard! A whole TWENTY PEOPLE were killed! We wheep for those poor, innocent, people!

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Innocent nothing! *Kicks the cnn anchor out of his chair*

Lou Dobbs: Who the F are you?!

Divine Neos: People of the world! My name is The Divine Neos! What we have here is a demon by the name of Zuur, he is a big wig of the legions of hell. And he feeds off the blood of the innocent. And I don't mean pregnant teenagers looking for a way out! I mean like little babies and shit! And--

Lou Dobbs: Nobody takes my air time! *Leaps at Neos and tackles at him*

Divine Neos: Ah! Get off of me! You smell like mustard!

Divine Neos: OW! LOU DOBBS BIT ME!

Lou Dobbs: There's plenty more where that came from!
**CNN is currently having technical difficulties. We will be back shortly**

Fire Bird: People of the United States! It has come to my attention that this recent outbursts of radical Christian zealots with super powers have come out of the woodworks! No doubt to scare you on election day... I assure you, that it is all FAKE! There's no such thing as demons and angels! This is all a ploy by the religious right, that is why when I become president.. we will completely seperate church and state! *The crowd cheers*

Fire Bird: Finnaly we are going to have sensible, moral legislation in the whitehouse! *More cheers, people boo in the back*

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BOOOO! YOU SUCK! GO BACK TO RUSSIA YOU DAMN COMMIE!

Fire Bird: Oh great... libertarians... -__-;;

Shining Flare: Aren't you sick of democrats talking to you about freedom but policing your wallets?! What's the point of having legalized pot if it's going to be protected in bullet proof glass and only accessible to the super rich through liberal taxation? What's the point of liberal sex laws if you're going to have to get a blood test every month or face a fine? Democrats promise you more freedom. All they really promise you is more hassle! That's why me and Mudball Man here are running on the libertarian party ticket!

Mudball Man: *Nods* We're prochoice.. on everything!

Fire Bird: OMG, that line is so overused... -__-

Shining Flare: Don't trust this scheezer! Come join the libertarian party! *A bunch of the crowd cheers and follows*

Fire Bird: DAMN THEM LIBERTARIANS! >: ( I CAN'T HAVE THEM RUINING ANOTHER ELECTION! IT'S ALWAYS THEIR FAULT WE GET A GOD-DAMN REPUBLIC INTO OFFICE! GRRR! I hate to do this... but I have no choice...

*Fire Bird meets with "Him" in the private sancity of his office. His face is blurred over heavy amounts of cigarette smoke*

Fire Bird: *Coughcough!* How do you manage to afford these with the taxes?!

Psycho Crusher: Mein liption.. you act outside the law! I get what I want without the confines of your socialisms and capitalisms!

Fire Bird: Ok, why is the leader of the communist party sound German?

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Silence! Number 46! Play zee music!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bzWSJG93P8

Fire Bird: Oh my God... I'm dealing with a lunatic!

Psycho Crusher: So you vish you have zee help of the communist party eh? Ve aren't cheap! And you vill have to zeeuboordinate with vour evvy move!

Fire Bird: Stop with the fake accent, it's annoying.

Psycho Crusher: K

Psycho Crusher: We at the communist party have big plans... we will help you, but you will need to stop pussyfooting and take a sharp turn toward the left. The REAL left!

Fire Bird: Fine, you can do whatever you want! Just make sure the republicans don't win! The libertarians are getting in the way again...

Psycho Crusher: Oh, I'm quite familiar with the libertarians.. *Puffs in some smoke and blows it in Fire Bird's face*

Psycho Crusher: You just leave them to me. *Standsup and nazi salutes*

Fire Bird: Are you communist or nazi?! They're different you know!

Number 42: Give him a break lady! He's been a little messed up in the head sense his wife left him..

Number 42: Eh... more messed up in the head...

Psycho Crusher: Messed up? No dear number 42! It made me enlightend, which bestowed me with these powers that I will use to CRUSH ZEE LIBERTARIANS!

Fire Bird: Why do you hate libertarians so much?

Fire Bird: I mean besides the obvious reason that they talk out their ass, are complete nihilists, and simply help keep corporations stepping on the little guy?

Psycho Crusher: I use to be a libertarian. I truly thought zee free market was for the greater good. But then I was BETRAYED! Left to die in the middle of zee road like a vermin! Where was zee free market then?!

Fire Bird: I don't believe I follow you...

Number 42: Psycho Crusher was banned from the libertarian party.. He had some um... "different" views on the direction of the party!

Psycho Crusher: It was then that zee wonderful Red Viper offered me a place in the communist party. Because of recent media attention, he had to stepdown as party chairman, and I took his place...

Fire Bird: Yeah.. probably not the best move...

Psycho Crusher: I WILL NOT HAVE YOU INSUATING ANYTHING BAD ABOUT ZEE COMMUNIST PARTY! HEIL!! *Nazi salute*

Fire Bird: Am I like in some really really bad comedy?!

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Meanwhile... At the republican party!

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You barging into CNN to warn the people about Zuur was a stupid move Neos! Now abortion rates are the highest they've been sense the eighties! It's like you Rick Rolled Heaven itself with your little stunt!

Divine Neos: You humans are such spiteful creatures...

Blackluster Soldier: Well, I have probability control. So I may be able to sway some of that "choice" in the right direction... but Zuur is becoming ever more powerful! We must put a stop to him!

Divine Neos: But how?! The people, they won't listen!

Blackluster Soldier: They won't listen to us... but I think I know summon who they will... He's going to announce himself as the republican candidate!

Later that day...
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And that is why I'm running for president for the republican party! I will answer your questions now!

News Anchor: Sir! SIR! Cyber Commando! Is is true that you knew about the totures in Iraq?!

Cyborg Commando: I believe in the constitution madam, not petty vengence.. those rumors are fabricated lies.. next question!

Another news anchor: Any idea who your running mate is going to be?!

Cyborg Commando: I don't know... there's alot of crooks in Washington in all the parties... they'll do anything to win an election, even sell out their values!

Watching tv in Psycho Crusher's office
Fire Bird: Oh dear God, he's talking about me!
Psycho Crusher: Relax mein future fuhrer'! Have a smoke!

Cyborg Commando: But I garantee you that whoever it is.. will uphold American values, and will help make make this country awaken and see that we didn't turn bad, we were ALWAYS a good nation, we just lost our confidence. So let's workout, shave, and look ourselves in the mirrior and say.. damnit America! You're too good to be whallowing in self pity! It's time to be proud again folks! *Everybody cheers*


Shining Flare: Ah MAN! That got the God-damned Cyber Commando on their side! How are we suppose to compete with that!

Mudball Man: I don't know if this is such a good idea anymore!

*A man in a corporate suit walks out of the shadows*

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Spirit Reaver: You WILL run, and you will win! You Spirit Enterprise behind you gentlemen! And I expect you to see this to the end! Don't let a few plastic flags and wife beating rednecks scare you! This country will be ours, and you two will be very rich, very respected gentlemen! *Puts his arms over their shoulders*

Shining Flare: Snootch to the nootch!
If one's actions are honest, one does not need the predated confidence of others, only their rational perception. The person who craves a moral blank check of that kind, has dishonest intentions, whether he admits it to himself or not.

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Postby Jim Profit » Thu Mar 19, 2009 3:45 am

ISSUE #2: Sell Your Soul, You'd Never Know It Was Gone Anyway!

Bill O' Reilly: It seems the democratic party has decided to nominate as their presidential nomination someone OUTSIDE OF THEIR OWN PARTY! Would you mine explaining this to us you two?

Fire Bird: Well... we wanted to show the country that we are a party of diversity, and endorse new ideas.. So we called fourth many different people to present their views..

Bill O' Reilly: And you chose the communist party?

Fire Bird: Communism is not a bad word! Communism is... like a family! And a family...

Psycho Crusher: Family? Dude, we're running on the pro-abortion platform cause of that stupid Zuur attack. We're not pro-family!

Fire Bird: Shush Psycho! HEHEH! Psycho's a real jokester...

Bill O' Reilly: Is it true Psycho Crusher that you were one that wrote the bill of "sexual decriminalization act" that would permit all forms of sex under the grounds of privacy and it got thrown out do to it's refusal to acknowledge rape and pedophilia?

Psycho Crusher: Well, I see no reason why--

Fire Bird: Uh..BILL! Why don't you talk about more recent events?!

Bill O' Reilly: Let the man speak Fire Bird! With all do respect, he's running for president, not you!

Fire Bird: Well yes but..

Bill O' Reilly: No buts! Please Psychi Crusher.. go on..

Psycho Crusher: *Sings*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5Wuybp40gE

Bill O' Reilly: .....

His Other Guests: ....

Fire Bird: Oh dear Lord, I'll never be able to show my face in politics again!

Another Guest: Bill...Bill are you alright?

Bill O' Reilly: WHAT THE #@#$#$ IS WRONG YOU, YOU @#$@# SICKO?! YOU #@#$@#% AND #$#!%# AND #$%$!#%@ IN YOUR @~@$#$ WITH THE #$#%

Someone behind the scenes: Bill, calmdown! You know what happens when you get mad!

Bill O' Reilly: @$##@% IT! WILL DO IT LIVE! WILL DO IT LIIIIVE!!!

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BILL SMASH! BILL SMASH YOU ALL! *Runs through the wall and goes on a rampage, you hear car alarms and people screaming*

Fox News Employee: Thanks alot "Mr.President"! You know how many female employees were going to have to let him violate to calm his ass down?!

Another Fox Employee: Ohwell, let's just be glad he wasn't on Sean Hannity!



As the elections draw near... there is the debates... and a surprising turn of events happen as there is rampant mudslinging

Moderator: I hate to say this.. But Psycho Crusher is actually being the most civil in this debate!

Psycho Crusher: It's just unbecoming of would be presidents.. They have NO class! *Shakes his head, lights up a cigarrette, and scratches his balls*

Cyber Commando: I quit! I am dropping my name off the ballot! *The entire audience gasps*

Moderator: Cyber Commando?!

Cyber Commando: This debate made me realize something.. The republican party.. It ain't what it use to be.. the libertarians, though I disagree with them on the issues, has more in common with the republican party "I" grewup on! These neoconservatives, they've been telling me what to say, and make me tell myself what I'm doing is right! But it's not! I give my full support to the libertarian party!

Shining Flare: Snootchie Bootchies!

Psycho Crusher: Damn! Time to act fast!

Psycho Crusher: Uh...don't applaud this man! Cyber Commando is only telling you what you want to hear! Oh sure, he conquered the nazis.. after England did all the work! But what about the faults of his generation? Women could not vote, the railroading companies were a monopoly, children were given morphine to shut them up when they would cry! It was a hectic time, and that's why the life expectancy was like.. fifty! If you elect the libertarian party.. Be prepared for some hectic times again where people die on the street because private hospitals can deny them service, where tainted peanuts are the norm, and they put cocaine in your soda to keep you addicted and buying...


Later on... The Polls comeback, and the libertarians are the winner!

Fire Bird: Oh my fricking GOD! I sold out to you and you didn't even get us to win!

Psycho Crusher: Well.. you DID say not to let the republicans beat us! I fulfilled that end of the bargain!

*all the communists start whispering and getting giddy*

Psycho Crusher: What's all this about?

*Red Viper suddenly bursts through the door*

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Crusher you little worm! You get us on the ballot only for us to lose to LIBERTARIANS?!

Psycho Crusher: It was a small victory, but I believe we won in the..

Red Viper: WE didn't win anything! It's over for you Psycho Crusher, you're done!

Psycho Crusher: Viper.. I'm not going to pretend I give a damn what you have to say *blows smoke in his face* "I" am the leader of the communist party now! You have no power over me!

Red Viper: Maybe not, but that's how I know you've desecrated everything the party stands for! With your ranks, and your numbers! This is NOT how the communists do things Psycho Crusher! If you want to make a fascist party out of the communists.. you can.. but not with us! I'm not saying you're kicked out of the communist party, I'm saying me, and the rest are leaving! We're joining the democrats! And will hopefuly fix the image of Fire Bird which YOU tarnished!

Psycho Crusher: Ha! My loyal minions would never turn on me--hey, where are you guys going?! *Number 42 goes to leave, and Psycho Crusher extends his arm*

Psycho Crusher: Et' Tu Number 42?

Hammer: My name is Hammer you jackass! *Kicks him in the balls and he falls down in pain*

Psycho Crusher: Fine! Leave! I don't you! I don't need any of you! I will revitalize the communist party without your help! And they will be blackjack! And hookers! Infact.. forget the party!

MSNBC News: Tonight, the communist party is officaly dead! With no outside funding, or voter participation. The party has officaly cancled.. After the roaring defeat against libertarian canidate Mudball Man, and his vice presidential nominee Shing Flare.. noone can say they did not expect this to happen...

MSNBC News: In other news... Spirit Corporation has released a new drug that can heal nerve tissue damage! It has yet to be tested.. but is said to have been used on many particpants and has seen no side effects! He is going to have a dinner party with the new president, and they will celebrate his victory. Well good for them. Wish I was invited!

At Spirit Reaper's factory...

Spirit Reaper: Well hellp there Mr. President! Didn't I tell you you'd win?!

Mudball Man: I gotta' say Spirit! I don't know how you pulled it off but...

Spirit Reaper: Oh that was easy! Humans... they're such fragile creatures... they get sick... they die... how do you think I'm going to let you in on a little secret Mudball Man... But in exchange... I want your complete loyalty... I can't have you getting all moral on me. This is why Cyber Commando must never know how the libertarian party functions!

Mudball Man: I don't understand.. what? Are we soliciting illegal narcotics from Africa or something?

Spirit Reaper: HAHAHAHA! That's kids stuff Mudball Man! No No.. This is much more well thought out! Come here! *Waves to one of his factory workers* Yes you, come here!

Factory Worker: Yes sir? *Spirt Reaper shoots him in the leg*

Factory Worker: OW! What the hell is wrong with you?!

Spirit Reaper: Hahahaha!

Mudball Man: You sick bastard! *Mudball Man goes to summon up some earth energy and Spirit Reaper extends his hand*

Spirit Reaper: NNow hold on! Both of you just calm down! I'm a man of principle, and believe in non-aggression! I did this to show you something! Now.. can you move your leg?

Factory Worker: No I can't move my leg! You completely shattered the kneecap! Someone call an ambulance!

Spirit Reaper: No, need for that! *Spirit Reaper opens up a bag of M&Ms, puts some in his hand and clenches his fist. A glowing white energy emits from his hand and then he opens it up*

Spirit Reaper: Here.. take this..

Factory Worker: ...

Spirit Reaper: Go on! *The Factory Worker slowly eats the M&Ms, and the bullet wound begins to heal, and he can move his leg again*

Factory Worker: But...But how?!

Spirit Reaper: What am I? A Magic-8 ball? Get back to work before I dock your pay!

Mudball Man: So... you can heal peope?

Spirit Reaper: Not just heal people! But through my blood, my spit, even my piss I can cure all ailments! I've even learned to just concentrate it into pure energy! With my powers I could end all disease, cure cancer!

Mudball Man: So why do you need me?

Spirit Reaper: You still don't get it do you? I don't need the government getting in my way. If they were to findout about my powers I would be EXPECTED to help! What's in it for me?! Ayn Rand taught us the value of selfishness Mudball Man! We are special! And we should not have to share our powers with anyone! This drug company I run... is but a mere FRACTION of my power! I will become John Galt, don't you see?! I will slowly introduce new, and better medications, untill I feel the public is ready for cancer curing drugs! Then.. the newfound drugs will be expensive, only the best of society will be able to afford them!

Mudball Man: This isn't free market capitalism Sprit Reaper.. It's Darwinism!

Spirit Reaper: Stop thinking like a statist Mudball Man! You deserve better then a life of servitude! It's these pathetic vermin who have to PRAY for heaven! WE can make it ourselves!

Mudball Man: Ok... so that's all you want out of me? To look the other way while you monopolize the drug market and create your little utopia? Fine...

Spirit Reaper: Don't get testy Mudball Man. I might like you, but I can easily have you replaced! And no, that's NOT all I'm asking of you! I want you to make sure that noone innitiates force against my rights! You are going to make sure that no socialist pigs findout about this, and if they do, you will ELIMINATE them!

Mudball Man: But why me?! Why couldn't you have had the republicans do it?! They've been in the corrupt buisness alot longer then I have!

Spirt Reaper: You still don't get it do you? They're FASCISTS Mudball Man! They only care about their stupid sense of right and wrong! They won't let the mighty like us prevail! Just cling to their precious guns and bibles like the fat hillbillies that they are! You and I...we are THE FUTURE!

Mudball Man: I guess so... does Shining Flare know about this?

Spirit Reaper: No, and he must never know! That fool could ruin all of our plans! He is reckless, brash, and unpredictable! He's like that damn Psycho Crusher! Infact.. I'd have kicked him out of the party just like Psycho Crusher if you hadn't nominated him at your vice president nominee!

Mudball Man: We've been best friends since gradeschool! He was the only other kid with super powers and...

Spirit Reaper: Yeah yeah YEAH! It's time to growup Mudball Man! Live in the real world! Success is the only friend you need! Women? Power? Cars? Fine food? You can have it all! You don't need guys like him holding you back! Psycho Crusher thought like you... I bet he's crying himself to sleep over his slut of an ex wife!


Meanwhile, Psycho Crusher sits on his bed and looks at a picture of his ex wife.. tears land on the picture

Psycho Crusher: Sniffle! *He heres a window crash open*

Psycho Crusher: Who's there?! *He opens the door and finds a theif*

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Oh, excuse me sir.. But I'm lost..

Psycho Crusher: That has to be the WORST excuse a theif has ever come up with! Is this what you want?! *Throws his ex wife's photo at her* Take it! You bastards have taken everything else from me!

*The picture goes right through her as she becomes clear as water*

Psycho Crusher: So... you're a super...

Water Girl: Yes, I am! And I know you have more then a picture of some ugly girl! Now give me all your money!

Psycho Crusher: Fate has lead us together... perhaps God has given me a second chance at love.. Why would you just break into a house to rob a man of his cash and not just mug someone in the street?

Water Girl: Well now that you meation it... I guess this plan was pretty stupid!

Psycho Crusher: No, it was genius! For you see girly...

Image
I am a super too...

Water Girl: What's your? Oh...Oh wow, I feel really...dizzy? *Falls down on her bottom*

Water Girl: Ow! The room is spinning!

Psycho Crusher: This is just one of my powers girly.. the power to drain the essence out of people, and leave them tired and unmotivated.. As I am ever since I lost that which is dear to me...

Water Girl: What are you doing?! Get your hands off me! Stop kissing on my neck!

Water Girl: Damnit! I'm too tired! If I go into water form, I might not be able to turn back! Man, what a predicament! A theif getting raped! By a guy who tried to run for president! Well... I guess it's not THAT unusual... *Psycho Crusher looks at her squirming and pushes her away*

Water Girl: OW! Jesus Christ!

Psycho Crusher: You don't want me! You think I'm hideous!

Water Girl: It's not that.. it's just, you know.. I didn't expect to break into a house and for some guy to take away all my energy and leave me completely at his mercy while he fondles me... It's not exactly a romantic fantasy you know?!

Psycho Crusher: Just go...

Water Girl: I'd love too, but you drained all my energy you dumbass! I can barely move!

Psycho Crusher: Well find.. just sit there till your strength comes back.. I'm going to bed... if you feel like killing me in my sleep you go right ahead...

Water Girl: Oh My GOD! All the people to rob and I get the crazy, manic-depressive one! My life SUCKS! As if being homeless wasn't enough!

Psycho Crusher: You're homeless you say?

Water Girl: Duh! Why do you think I'm robbing YOU?!

Psycho Crusher: Hmm...

Water Girl: What? What's that look in your eye?

Psycho Crusher: Perhaps you can be useful to me yet little girl!

Water Girl: Actually I like to call myself Water Girl...

Image

Water Girl: -___-;;

Psycho Crusher: I HAVE THAT MOVIE! LET'S GO WATCH IT AND SNUGGLE AND EAT COOKIES! IT'LL BE JUST LIKE A SLUMBER PARTY! :D

Water Girl: Oh dear God, I wish he had just raped and killed me.. -____-;;

Later...
Psycho Crusher: lololol! Adam Sandler is so funny! Oh I'm so glad I met you! *Nuzzles up close to her and munches on a chocolate chip cookie*

Water Girl: -______-;;;;
If one's actions are honest, one does not need the predated confidence of others, only their rational perception. The person who craves a moral blank check of that kind, has dishonest intentions, whether he admits it to himself or not.

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Postby Jim Profit » Thu Mar 19, 2009 4:56 am

Episode #3: Better of Two Evils

News Stations All Over: Recently, Mudball Man has signed a bill putting all those in politics into investigation. Their refusal to abide by their own laws he says, makes them unfit to govern! Truly Mudball Man does not fit him, as he's CLEANING UP Washington!

Spirit Reaper: That's good Mudball Man! That's reall good! This is all going so well! Better then I expected... *Suddenly an explosion bursts open a big gap in the wall of Spirit's factory*

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Stop!
Hammer time...

Spirit Reaper: WTF Is this shit?!

Hammer: I know the truth about your industry Spirit Reaper, I know all about how you are witholding your powers from the populace... *Hammer walks slowly toward him*

Spirit Reaper: Who told you?! Was it mud ball man?!

Hammer: Let's just say I have my ways of getting the information I want out of people... *Pulls up his sleeve and red sparks fly out of his arm as he places his palm on the ground and the floor collapse into a pit in which Spirit Reaper falls in, as Hammer goes to look down at him Spirit Reaper laughs maniaticaly*

Spirit Reaper: I see! The capitalist creates, the communist destroys! Tell me... do you think you'll accomplish anything by killing me?! All you're going to do is make people lose their lives without MY medicine!

Hammer: Stop treating me like one of your political pundit sheep! I know you have no intention of curing anyone! I will bury you underneath your own corrupt factory! Goodbye Spirit Reaper!

Spirit Reaper: No, stop it! Maybe we can work something out... Noooo!!! *Hammer uses a huge burst of energy and collapses the whole factory, as he walks slowly away he sees Red Viper*

Hammer: It's done sir.. Spirit Reaper is disposed of for good!

Red Viper: Excellent! Progress is propelling comrade! I knew once we seperated from that accursed Psycho Crusher, we'd see some real changes!


Meanwhile... Psycho Crusher and Water Girl are walking down the street when all of a sudden Psycho stops

Water Girl: Why'd you stop?

Psycho Crusher: We're being followed...

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This mysterious stranger, weilding bayonets comes lunging at Psycho Crusher and misses.. he then sees Water Girl and attempts to cut into her but she goes into water form and his slashes have no effect...

Bladedge: What sortof demon magic is that?!

Psycho Crusher: My fatigue.... Why isn't my fatigue working on this guy?!

Bladedge: God protects me from your pathetic commie powers Psycho Crusher, and by his grace I shall have your blood.. Amen! *Bladeedge summons a bunch of bayonets from simply out of nowhere lunging toward Psycho Crusher. Psycho Crusher manages to dodge some of them, but a couple pierce at his arms and legs and he is wounded and on his knees*

Bladege: Amen! *Bladedge dual wields bayonets and walks slowly toward Psycho Crusher*

Water Girl: Stop it! What has Psycho ever done to you?!

Bladege: What has he done to me?! WHAT HAS HE DONE TO ME?! He is the epitmy of sin you stupid hussy! This man is responsible for some of the most un Godly bills I have ever seen! He is a disgrace to the human race!

Water Girl: And what?! The other guys aren't?!

Bladedge: All of them must be heald accountible for their sins.. but especially this one! Now... I have no desire to kill you... So just stay out of my way! *As he goes to kill Psycho Crusher Water Girl sticks out her hand and Bladedge begins to choke*

Bladedge: Water...I need water! .__. *Bladedge coughs up some dust and begins to look really thin and falls to the floor, Psycho Crusher manages to pull himself up*

Psycho Crusher: What did you do to him?

Water Girl: I have the power to control water in all kinds of different ways. I absorbed the water from his body. Completely dehydrating him.

Psycho Crusher: Brutal...

Water Girl: Maybe... But he had it coming. Are you alright?

Psycho Crusher: You care about me. : )

Water Girl: Well.. well ofcourse I do! I mean you offered to take me in and live with you just out of the blue! And after I tried to rob you! That's saintly!

Psycho Crusher: I did it for the pussy... :P

Water Girl: -___-

Water Girl: You just had to ruin it didn't you? Here I was, saying what a nice guy you are, and you have to go and prove me wrong.. -____-

Psycho Crusher: Succesful fascist is succesful! Haha! OW! It hurts to laugh! ; _ ;

Water Girl: Serves you right asshole...

*As they walk away, Bladedge looks over at them with his cracked, driedout eye, as he begins to deeply inhale and regenerate, and mutters under his breath*

Bladedge: Amen....

Meanwhile... at the republicans lair!

Blackluster Soldier: Damnit! Our plan to kill Psycho Crusher didn't work!

Divine Neos: Why were we going after Psycho Crusher anyway?! I mean sure the guy's crazy! But libertarians are in office, and ever since crime rate has SKYROCKETED! Recently we've seen Cyber Commando join them and havn't even TRIED to stop them! Zuur is still on the loose and everybody's just kind of seem to have forgotten about him!

Blackluster Soldier: Americans have short attention spans Neos! Nobody cares about Zuur anymore! Besides, Psycho Crusher holds--

Divine Neos: WELL I CARE ABOUT ZUUR! I WAS SPECIFICALY SENT FROM HEAVEN TO INSURE MORTAL SAFETY BY GETTING RID OF ZUUR! And I thought I had you guys help! But I guess I was wrong!

Blackluster Soldier: You have to be patient Neos! We have to trust the head master's judgement! And he says that Psycho Crusher is the largest threat at the moment!

Divine Neos: But that doesn't make sense! Zuur is getting stronger and stronger! And the libertarians are enabling it with their abortion clinics now sounding like used car salesmen!

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Patience Divine Neos! We must wait...

Blackluster Soldier: Headmaster Tempest! *He takes a bow and pullsdown Divine Neos*

Blackluster Soldier: Bow stupid!

Divine Neos: Who the heck is this guy?!

Blackluster Soldier: Who the heck is this guy?! This is the leader of the republican party! You show some respect! He could crush you like a bug!

Divine Neos: I fear no man! I am a servant of God! Now you answer me this "Tempest"! Why are we wasting our time on some criminaly insane clown, when there are more pressing matters to contend too?!

Tempest: You say you only fear God?

Divine Neos: Yes, I've been over this with you people before! I am from heaven, and I... *Tempest eyes roll in the back of his head and he shoots volts of electrcity through his hand at Divine Neos who convulses heavily as his muscles spasm violently from the surge of lightning*

Tempest: Here Divine Neo, I am God! And you will abide by my command! Is that clear?!

Divine Neos: Crysal... @_@


Meanwhile... the democrats plan their next move...

Firebird: So how exactly am I suppose to fix my reputation?!

Red Viper: Me and the others have been discussing it, and we think the only sensible solution would be for us to put a stop to Zuur...

Firebird: You serious? That dude's fricking nuts! More nuts then Psycho Crusher! And WAY more dangerous! he's so fricking out there with the powers that the government just declared him as a force of nature so they wouldn't have to go after him anymore!

Red Viper: EXACTLY! And now that the libertarians are incharge, there's no funding for police! It's all "private contractors!" Meaning this Zuur character is free to on a rampage against innocent people! If we can put a stop to him, we'll be heroes! And people will flock to us!

Firebird: I suppose...


Meanwhile... at the white house...

Mudball Man: I can't take it Shining Flare! After knowing what I know, I feel like I've become the very thing I hate!

Shining Flare: You know what you gotta' do right? You gotta' tear up some ass! That'll clear your conscience!

Cyber Commando: He's right! You're going to need to takeout Zuur! This Zuur is just a killing machine! He makes the nazis look like school kids! If you ever want to redeem yourself Mudball... this would be the way to do it... *Puts his hand on Mudball's shoulder*

Mudball Man: I can't do this alone! Zuur is a super the likes of which the world hasn't seen!

Shining Flare: You won't be alone man! You got us!

Cyber Commando: We stick together!

Shining Flare: Damn right!

Mudball Man: Yeah! Sigh... I wish I had known how corrupt the libertarians were on the inside... maybe then we'd have Psychi Crusher to help us...

Shining Flare: We don't need that crazy S.O.B! He's just a sociopath! Forget about him!


Meanwhile...
Guy: I'm sorry, but it's over... you're just clinging! And I can't breathe!

Girl: But I love you! ; _ ;

Water Girl: Comeon Psycho Crusher.. you don't need to see this..

Psycho Crusher: No Water Girl, it's time I showed you my second power. My most powerfulest power, and why I think people want me dead.
*Psycho Crusher goes up to the couple*

Psycho Crusher: Hey, you, the dickhead... stop making your girlfriend cry... You two need eachother. You don't want to endup alone. One day you're going to find that the only thing in life worth having is her. Cause in the end noone else is going to give a crap about you but her, or cut you any slack but her, so take advantage!

Guy: What are you, my mother?! Get out of here! This is none of your buisness...

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I've made it my buisness... Now kiss, makeup, and love eachother FOREVER!
*The two stare in eachother's eyes and makeout*

Guy: I'm sorry, I was just being stupid!
Girl: Nono, it was my fault! Let's get married!
Guy: Ok!

Water Girl: Holy crap! You can control minds?!

Psycho Crusher: Yeah sure, just yell it... noone will hear you.. -_-

Water Girl: Well, I'm sorry. It just seems like all this time you could've spammed the hell out of something like that and won the election.

Psycho Crusher: It's not that simple. For one, my mind control only works once on a person. I'd have to set up a system where I couldn't be de-throned... the democratic process and term limits would get in the way of my political desires... so the mind control can only do so much. I have to control the system!

Water Girl: ....Did you mind control me?

Psycho Crusher: Don't be stupid.

Water Girl: No seriously... did you do the freaky pink eye on me?! You did didn't you?!

Psycho Crusher: What makes you think I used the mind control on you?! Why would I waste it on you now, when we just met?!

Water Girl: Because I'm falling inlove with you asshole!

Psycho Crusher: Well I didn't you dumb bitch, so stop nagging!

Water Girl: Dumb bitch?! I'll show you dumb bitch! *Messes with the water in his stomache causing him to puke. As he's on his knees and can't stop puking, his eye glows and Water Girl gets very fatigue and nearly fants as she lands on the pavement and then he pukes again right on her face*

Water Girl: OH MY GOD! GROSS GROSS GROSS!!!

Psycho Crusher: IT WAS YOUR OWN FAULT YOU STUPID SKANK!

Water Girl: IT WAS YOUR FAULT FOR MIND CONTROLLING ME!

Psycho Crusher: I DIDN'T MIND CONTROL YOU!

Water Girl: I HATE YOU!

Psycho Crusher: I HATE YOU MORE!
*They stare at eachother all pissed off, then give eachother a passionate kiss, then as the intimacy pulls back a little, and the anger turns into lust in the eyes, Psycho's mouth puffs up and BLARGH! Pukes all over her again*

Water Girl: We're not going to have a normal relationship, are we? -__-

Psycho Crusher: Nope, doesn't look that way...

Water Girl: So where are we going anyway?
*Psycho helps her up*

Psycho Crusher: Well, I discovered Zuur gets more powerful with every abortion. And I am a firm prolife advocate...

Water Girl: ....

Psycho Crusher: Oh don't act so shocked. I purposely put on my theatrics to sabatoge the democrats. I didn't think the libertarians would win... but that's not the point! The point is, Zuur represents everything that is evil and wrong. And he must be stopped.

Water Girl: Annnd you just now are telling me this? I've been following you all this time on a suicide mission?

Psycho Crusher: Well I...

Water Girl: IF WE'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE THESE BIG DECISIONS WITH ME!

Psycho Crusher: NAG NAG NAG! YOU'RE LIKE MY MOTHER!

Water Girl: OH NO YOU DIDN'T BITCH! AAARGH!

Psycho Crusher: AAARGH! *Pukes on her*

Water Girl: Ok, you did that one on purpose. -___-
If one's actions are honest, one does not need the predated confidence of others, only their rational perception. The person who craves a moral blank check of that kind, has dishonest intentions, whether he admits it to himself or not.


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