Fun things your players have done

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Arlyansor
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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby Arlyansor » Tue Sep 24, 2013 5:34 am

In various games, I've seen the following done:

When approaching the gates of a city in a fantasy game, when challenged by the gate guard and asked to pay the toll, the answer was, "Pay to enter THIS fleapit?!? Hell no!" They then turned around and walked away. The GM at the time (a very literal fellow) did not not know how to deal with that and the game died right there (a record to my knowledge - the game lasted less than 5 minutes in total).

In another fantasy game, the PC's are tasked with retrieving children kidnapped by an insane silver dragon (whose eggs (ie children) were destroyed by the town's ancestors decades ago. When the PC's encountered the dragon the very first time, one PC steps forward, and calmly says, "Greetings Master, I bring you these three as slaves..." pointing at the other PC's. The players jaws literally dropped, and, again, the game died right there.

In a Necessary Evil game, the invisible and intangible Nazi hunting ghost character secretly dosed hundreds of spectators at a pit fight with mega-doses of laxatives. Then when the authorities inevitably arrived, and sounded their very very BASS warning sirens, hundreds of spectators promptly shit themselves...

In the same Necessary Evil game, a character whose specialty was 'jinxing' things, scored a critical effect while trying to overload the nuclear/atomic engines and the GM scored a critical failure for said engine to resist the effect, and promptly nuked several blocks of Star City...

In a 1st Ed D&D game, the PC's came across a door in a dungeon, scrawled around the door in an obscure language (which one of the PC's did actually speak) were the words, "Asmodeus was here." The GM wrote this down and handed it to the player, who, in character, read out the words, thus summoning Asmodeus himself. The room beyond the door was supposed to actually have a programmed illusion of Asmodeus in it, but in this case, it was the real deal. Half of the party immediately bolted, and half stayed. A time-out was called, while the players discussed what to do, and then, one player said "Time In" just before another said, "OK asshole..." to Asmodeus. That character died very, very quickly...

In another 1st Ed D&D game, a player's intelligent sword liked to imitate voices, and as the PC's entered the domain of the ancient (and very powerful) vampire lord that ruled some city, his entire court (all vampires) was surrounding them, and when the vampire lord's Queen entered the deathly silent room, all that could be heard was the players voice (via the sword) saying, "Corr, bet she'd look good on the slab!" That player was rendered literally speechless for the rest of the night...

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby cobalt-blue » Tue Sep 24, 2013 5:47 am

In a Smallville game where the players are supposed to be keeping a low profile, have on occasion been forced to act to save lives, or to mete out some appropriate justice. In doing so, they've spread rumors of a MS-13 Ninja Biker Gang whose women dress in hockey masks.
The problem is now that the authorities are starting to take the idea of such a gang seriously.

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby IMPug » Wed Nov 13, 2013 6:14 pm

This weekend, my players had to stop a small army of 500+ superpowered aliens disguised as Old Testament angels from taking over the city of Chicago during the St. Patricks Day Parade through a combination of widely dispersed Willpower reducing nanites distributed through green food coloring, Catholic symbolism of angels returned to Earth and big area of effect hynoptism powers. (Aliens returned to Earth roughly 4 years before and have been slowing trying to take over the globe via religious superstition)

The team figured out the food coloring ploy and traced the manufacturer, sabotaged production at the manufacturing plant, used media manipulation to cause a general recall, and finally posed as health inspectors enforcing the recall. Of course, they did not get it all.

On the day of the parade, they used a carefully constructed magical ritual (one of the PC is a wizard) to be able to pick out the alien nanites that seem to be present in some gear that nearly every alien carries. The heroes dressed as leprechans on the day of the parade. Used their powers to sabotage the aliens float who were posing as the Knights of Columbus but could not stop them from marching in formation in the parade. During the parade, the Knights of Columbus morphed into angels and a leader among them began pontificating and tossing out the big mental whammy.

One of the heroes used the growth power to turn himself into a giant leprechan who went to battle against the terrorist Christian invaders who had ruined Ireland and the Irish culture and stole most of leprechan gold wealth or the centuries. While he did battle with hundreds of aliens in angel guise, the other heroes unmasked the leader as an alien by forcibly removing his alien-tech belt that projected the illusion of an angel. Most of the other "angels" legitimately had shapechanging ability but reverted to alien form when unconscious.

The fight included an giant pot of gold (wizards Create power) crushing angel/aliens via rolling around (wizards ability to move his creation) and telekinesis of another hero...as well as the giant leprechan's shillelagh sweeping through ranks of angels/aliens. The entire scene got more comical as the players played upon the leprechan theme.

The epic battle was on the news of most news channels. The more sensational the news program was, the better and more accurate their story was. The more established news programs did their level best in denial to try to debunk the massive St Patricks Day Hoax.

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby Crazyivan777 » Wed Nov 13, 2013 7:37 pm

...That is just amazing. Amazing.

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby iNSOMN14 » Fri Nov 15, 2013 11:46 am

It is only now, a year removed from the events to be described below, that I can finally come to terms with the fact that if I give my players the opportunity to both ruin a person's life and them them straight, they will jump on it at the drop of a hat.

While chasing down a group of villains who were researching different ways to empower people with super powers so that they could raise an army of metahumans to save the world from an alien invasion, the team stumbles upon the story of a missing kid who, unbeknownst to the group at the time, had developed mutant powers and had been kidnapped by said group of villains. After talking to the boy's mother and hacking the security cameras at his school, the group discovers the last people to talk to the boy before he disappeared: a pair of middle school bullies.

And here is the part were the heroes decide is it time to make sure these kids never want to bully anyone ever again.

First they take their VTOL reassembled key and paint it black and cover it in Christmas lights. Next they get several orange jumpsuits and Obama face masks. The teleporter, the mentalist, and the gravity controller all dress up in the suits and masks while the water controller is strapped to a medical gurney and two more are placed beside him.

That night, the teleporter uses his portals to pull the bullies from their beds and right into the gurnies. The gravity controller floats one into the air and dropped him through a pair of the teleporter's portals set up in Portal-style infinite ports drop. Then, using the mentalist's telepathy to give them all booming voices, they asked anout the missing boy. The bully, dumbfounded, shouted WHAT?, causing one of them to point a metal rod at the water controller, at which point he used his water for post to appear to be melting. It is at this time both bullies lost it. They tell everything they know about the boy, how one of them still wets the bed, etc.

After promising to keep an eye on the boys of they act up again, they send the bullies back to each other's home, causing even more confusion.

The best part was how little info they got, not no one cared. To this day, you can not say Obama face mask around them without someone at least cracking a smile.

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby Crazyivan777 » Fri Nov 15, 2013 12:27 pm

Unexpected derailment moment (in this case I was a player). We're playing 7th Sea, a swashbuckling RPG. A friend of the PC's has contacted us and said, "We've captured a baddie, we're going to do a hostage exchange to get one of ours back. Mind watching the prisoner while I take care of details?"
We go to the place, and we're told the prisoner is in the next room. The NPC ally leaves. After a very brief time, curiosity gets the best of us, and we go check the prisoner.
It's Giovanni Villanova.
For those who haven't played 7th Sea, Villanova is one of the three most feared men in the world, and while the other two are feared for combat prowess or magical ability, Giovanni is the crime boss of all crime bosses. He has spies and contacts everywhere, and he's completely ruthless at an almost unsurvivable level.
Well, what do we do? We certainly don't keep watch over his bound form while assassins come after us! We immediately cut him loose, apologize profusely for having held him hostage, and hustle him out of the building. We then spent the next four (GM ad-libbed) days getting him back to his home!

As icing on the cake, I managed to call Giovanni Villanova something very insulting during the trip, and walked away from it without him putting me on a hit list (I'd bet the party I could pull it off, and spent several hours of the session putting together the perfect opportunity to do it.)

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby cobalt-blue » Sun Nov 24, 2013 12:32 pm

Our Smallville game has been going on for over six months now. We started out in a world that was a mix of the TV series Smallville, the DC Animated shows, the comics, and the video games (which I've never played). The main difference in the world though is that none of the powerhouses of the DC Universe have ever shown up, and with a few notable exceptions (Cater Hall) there are no other aliens on the planet but my character. It was his arrival with his mother through a dimensional portal when he was seven that was the cause of the meteor storm. It pulled fragments of my character's homeworld's moon which had been destroyed by my character's dimension's Thanagarian's invasion of his homeworld. He is the regent heir and his mother was the regent.

The team consists of:
John Ross: A meteor freak with an intelligence that makes Lex Luthor look like a moron. John has no legs (An unfortunate accident with a harvester when he was young), no social skills, and a disturbing fascination with porn. He created an AI to surf the net for porn for him. We programmed the AI in his phone to say, “John you're being an ass.” every time he did something perverted or stupid.

Salem Raven Ryder:
A meteor freak with elemental controlling powers, and connections to the Kawachi tribe.

Alex Corwin:
An Atlantean orphan prince with anger issues.

Pergrine "Peri" Hawk: An intersexual winged brick with shape shifting and psionic powers.

We've worked hard to protect our small town from the ravages of Lex Corps, and OTC (A Japanese tech company). We've worked with the police and with Cadmus' facility that is offering our characters advanced placement science courses working with Doctors Sheldon Cooper, Leonard Hoffsteader, Raj Kuthrapali, Barbara Minerva, and Professor Howard Wallowitz. (Cooper has been removed from the facility because he can't keep a secret and got John kidnapped and most of his family murdered, not to mention Dr. Minerva turned into the Cheetah- she's sort of a good guy working with us now.)

We've been taken under the mentorship of the Justice Society which has had mixed results. Dr. Fate gave us a ring that would allow us to teleport to the JSA headquarters in Metropolis occasionally. Salem and Peri's mentor is Dinah Lance and they think she's useless. Alex's mentor is Carter Hall (whom Peri despises) who encourages Alex's anger issues problems. They had an adventure in Egypt where Alex and Carter stopped a dark wizard from destroying the world with a virgin sacrifice. Alex stopped it by seducing the sacrifice. (He'd just broken up with his girlfriend because he was a lawyer for Lexcorp and a major douchebag.) Later he complained about the situation and Salem's reply was “Alex, you popped the cherry that saved the world, and you're complaining?!” The running joke for that adventure was: Deflower the virgin and save the world.

None of the players have any respect for Clark Kent or Chloe Sullivan who sold out to Lexcorp eight years before the campaign begun. They do however respect Lois Lane.

Last night's game had some good and funny events, one of which left me laughing so hard the muscles in the back of my head started to ache.

In an earlier game the football team decided to “juice”because they were smarting from several years of losses while having to watch the cheering squad and the baseball teams take multiple National Championships and the baseball team the World Series. But the juicing was with a meteor infused mutagen that was turning them into a pack of werewolves. The antigen was developed but the only way to safely get it into their systems with enough dosage to reverse the effects was through a suppository. As a joke, Alex and Professor Wallowitz developed a pneumatic gun for delivering the suppository. It was decided not to use it because it would explode their colons. (Like I said it was a joke.)

One night Lexcorp and OTC decided to finally have it out in Smallville and put most of the town to sleep with a gas. It was robot ninjas and dragons vs. high tech mercenaries, and our team trying to minimize the damage and take out both forces. When Lexcorp started losing because OTC had dropped an EMP field on the town to keep Lexcorps weapons from working, Lexcorp released the mutagen which woke up the townspeople and turned them into various werebeasts.

After battling both sides, our characters headed to Cadmus to develop and deploy the antigen. Before we could get to the lab we were attacked by a further mutated and out of control “super” Cheetah. Since she was a friend we didn't want to hurt her but couldn't easily penetrate her skin because of the further mutation. So when she attacked, Peri telekinetically held her in place while Alex used the aforementioned “Pneumatic Butt Gun.” The last we saw of her for several weeks was her running south west at mach 5. (After the conflict, Peri sent her tickets for dinner and a movie.)

Victor Stone was part of our cheer leading team that went to nationals, but he was injured in an explosion not long afterward and was in an OTC medical facility in Kansas City where he had become Cyborg. When we visited him, we revealed our identities and tried to catch him up on the situation. Someone was trying to explain that Dr. Waller was some kind of super spy and said, “She's not that kind of a doctor, she's a spook.” Then immediately realizing what they'd said and to whom they said, they back pedaled and said, “Not that kind of spook, I meant a spy...

When trying to rescue John's sisters we found that we could not enter a particular section of the forest whenever we were angry or were having violent feelings- which meant that Alex couldn't enter it most of the time. His ex-girlfriend who was studying Kawachi magic was trying to explain the limitations of that magic and that she was mainly an herbalist when she made him a cup of tea and told him to drink it. It was only supposed to be a small sip, but she didn't say that, and in typical Alex fashion, he downed the whole cup and a brew that was supposed to ease his stomach and attitude instead gave him super human levels of noxious gas. He literally gassed out the guy we were looking for by running around the forest blowing out the back of his pants.

Still unable to locate John, someone suggested, “We're going about this all wrong. If we want to get a message to John all we have to do is use his AI to put subliminal messages on all the porn sites to contact his friends.” (It worked!)
Yet still waiting for John to contact us, I suggested to Dr. Fate that he should try locating the ring he gave John as he'd been unable to locate John's soul. (Because almost all his points went into IQ and AW, John's Will was beyond even Dr. Fate's ability to penetrate.) Dr. Fate looked at Peri and said, “You know, I honestly hadn't thought of that. I was too concerned about trying to locate his soul.

When the team was finally reunited, Alex was being particularly difficult to deal with when John's phone suddenly popped up and said, “Alex, you're being an asshole.

So over the last few weeks we've had the following zingers/surreal situation:

Deflower the virgin, save the world.
“You popped the cherry that saved the world and you're complaining?!”
Football players being rounded up and anally violated- for their own good.
The Pneumatic Butt Gun
Mercenaries vs. ninja robots and cyborg dragons.
A delayed dinner and a movie for Dr. Barbara Minerva.
Telling Victor Stone aka Cyborg that Dr. Amanda Waller was a spook.
An aquatic brick with super flatulence flushing out small animals and the guardian spirit of a forest.
“To contact John, all we have to do is leave a subliminal message on all the porn sites.”
Doctor Fate overthinking the situation.
“Alex, you're being an asshole.”

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby biggmcg » Fri Dec 06, 2013 6:13 pm

Continuing the 7th Sea vein, one of my players is a big Vesten warrior/ magic user. When a fight kicked off just outside the tavern they were drinking in, and he couldn't reach the door, he said, and I quote exactly "I run across the room, dive through the window, roll, come up to one knee and throw an axe from each hand." Stupefied by this example of actual swashbuckling, I hesitated a little too long, as he followed this up with "Oh, actually, I might get hurt. I cross the room, break the window with my axe, clear the glass from the frame, and climb out, trying not to step on any broken glass." :shock:

One of my players burned a karma die to make him fall over whilst climbing out, and windows are now my players' biggest nemesis.

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Re: Fun things your players have done

Postby Crazyivan777 » Sat Dec 07, 2013 8:58 am

The vesten's ancestors are -very- disappointed in him.


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